Temple and Family History

August 28, 2022 Today in Relief Society we were challenged to remember and record a time when we felt in awe of God and Christ, They talked about what makes it hard for us to feel that awe all the time. I didn’t say anything, but I thought about my current sadness related to Steven’s distance from us and from the church. He has been staying awake late and sleeping until early afternoon. He hasn’t been going to church or church activities. He hasn’t been having family prayer with us morning and evening. It is hard for me to feel joy in my relationship to him. I went shopping with him Friday. I played a game of Carcassonne with him and Ken. I talk with him about what food is available, but he obviously wants space. I have been reminded of a similar time before he was married to Alyssa when he stayed in the basement for months. One Sunday morning, I sat at the table in the breakfast nook in the kitchen praying to Heavenly Father for Steven and for myself, pondering my inability to help him and myself. As I sat there, I saw in my mind’s eye a vision of Steven coming the basement stairs, dressed in his suit, ready for sacrament meeting. A few moments later, I heard him on the stairs and looked to see him dressed in his suit, ready for sacrament meeting. I felt a humbled awe of the tender mercy I had just experienced, knowing for sure that God knew my son and he knew me and he loved us both and he wanted me to have hope and to know that he did. He had been helping Steven prepare for that moment and wanted me to know it. It is hard to remember in hard times when things have gone backwards for a while, that in the end we will be blessed and Christ will save all whom the Father has given him. He understands mental illness and has infinite patience. I need to trust him.